Seeing your daughter growing up in front of your eyes might seem like yesterday. In a blink of an eye, she has grown from playing with dolls to buying the ticket for the Taylor Swift contest! Now she is all about talking about her career, makeup and of course, her recent crush!
As she is all grown up, it is time for you to know and understand the most uncomfortable conversation ever – the period talk! Make sure she is not surprised when your daughter’s first period happens by preparing her beforehand.
Talking to your now grown-up daughter about her first periods can be awkward, but as a parent, you have to do it! Your daughter needs access to reliable sources of information. When they understand about their bodies and how they function, it will be easier for them to make informed decisions.
She might start with – “Eww gross” or “Mummy, that is so disgusting!” but you have to be patient and let her know everything about menstruation. If she asks you the most bizarre questions, then also you should have your answers ready. Most mothers get confused and go around asking others about this. But we are here to help you.
When is the right time to have the period talk? What should you talk about?
While you can start as early as the age of six or seven, it is a mandate for you to have the talk when she is around 10. If your child is just around 6 or 7 years old, you can talk about the basics. This is the time when they ask questions such as where babies come from, changing bodies, etc.
If she is a bit older, say around 9 years, then she might already have heard it from her friends or classmates. You can share detailed information with her like how a girl changes to a woman, the way babies come to earth, changing bodies, etc.
You should tell them that babies need to grow inside their mom for a time being and that place is called a uterus. Every month, the wall of the uterus gets ready for the baby. Educate her about Period Myths and facts.
If there is no baby, the uterus wall comes off and bleeds a little. Tell them that the blood typically comes out of a woman's private parts. The body creates a new wall every month, just in case the baby arrives. Try to deep dive a little when she is older, around the age of ten. However, you can skip the details if she is younger.
When do most girls get their period?
Most get it between the ages of 10 and 15. The average age is 12 so it is better to start the talk before she turns 10. One major sign that you should look out for is when their breasts start to grow.
It is said that girls get their periods two years after their breasts start to develop. Vaginal discharge is another sign, which starts about 6 months to a year before a girl gets her first period. It stays for around 5 days. However, the same might differ from one person to another.
What causes a period?
A period occurs because of the changes in the hormones in the body. You need to be fully informed before you go ahead and have the first-period talk. Be ready for all kinds of questions!! As you might already know, The ovaries release the hormones estrogen and progesterone, which leads to the buildup of the lining of the uterus. The built-up lining is ready for a fertilized egg to attach and start developing. The lining breaks down leading to bleeding if there is no fertilized egg. You get periods once a month as the lining takes about a month to build up.
Also read: Benefits of Periods
What happens if you are not comfortable having “the talk”?
While we highly recommend you have the talk directly with your child, if you are uncomfortable, you can share the information on some other day. A video or reading a book together can help! You can also ask her doctor or school counselor to educate her about the same. Show her a diagram if required.
Here are solid ways to prepare her for her first menstruation!
- Answer all her questions: To start with, you should have answers ready to all her questions. It will be a strange and confusing time for her and the questions can be silly! Give her the privilege.
- Listen to her: You need to listen to her as well. She might have heard a few things at school.
- Give her all the necessary items: What does a girl need for her first period? The first period can be scary! Remember when you first got it? As a parent, you must make sure that she has everything she needs before her first period starts.
- Explain PMS: You should also explain what PMS is, and the symptoms so that she is aware.
Symptoms are headaches, bloating, problems sleeping, mood swings, cramps, pimples, painful breasts and fatigue.
- Reassure her about her feelings: Yes, she might feel worried or stressed out. Validate her feelings and tell her that it is completely okay to feel this way. It is a milestone and she obviously will be anxious.
- Teach her how to use period products: You should educate her about how to use the underwear during her flow. You can also educate her and buy her period underwear, etc.
- Teach her about period tracking: You should also teach about how to track her monthly periods. A diary or an application might help. You should do everything so that she is always prepared and does not have to walk around with a stained skirt in her school!
- Keep communication open: Comfort her and tell her she can come up to you with her questions at any time. Communication is the key during this time of her life. Talk to her about menstrual products, menstrual hygiene, etc. Make sure that you tell her that there is nothing to be ashamed of and that every woman gets it.
- Talk to your child’s pediatrician: You should also have a talk with your child’s pediatrician. Maybe he/she can help you with some effective tips that would make your darling daughter more ready for her first period.
- Reassure her about the different kinds of pain and flow: Everything period is normal! And it is important for you to tell your child about it. Ask her not to compare hers with her friends. Share some coping hacks as well.
Finally
Preparing your child for her first period is not just about providing information but creating an open, supportive environment. Now that your little one is not so little anymore. So a clear communication, offering education, ensuring access to necessary period supplies, providing emotional support are a few things you need to do as her mom!
We would love to know about your experiences. Do share how have you handled this situation in the comments section below.